Depressing and Lonely

Hi, my name is David, and I'm 24 years old. I'm turning a year older this coming 30th of August. I'm currently preparing my enrollment for 2nd year of college here in Florida. I'm taking a computer course as same as the course I took back when I was living in the Philippines and that course is Computer Programming. And currently, I miss my Diane so very much. The atmosphere around me had change a lot when she left for Canada. And life without her is depressing and lonely.

I had a hard time letting her go when she and her family were leaving the next day for Canada. She and I slept in the car right in front of their family's friend's house, where they slept for the night, for a few hours and woke an hour away from her departure. It felt that I can take the risk of seeing her go, so while she was walking slowly away from me, I stared at her, and the second I saw her right next to the door, my heart just stopped, and I realize that I wont be able to see her again. I kept that fear in me. I tried not to let it out, and it's hurting me so much that I can die from keeping it inside. I desperately called her, yet I did not hear from her. I waited and know that Diane will come out to see me again. An hour passed. I felt a relief in my chest, for she came out to see me again. I had quickly hold her in my arms and told her "you're in my arms once more, I will never ever let you go again." But we had no choice but to let go of our arms and not let go of our special bond. We both promised that we'll be together always no matter what because we are perfectly destined for each other. And that final morning of us seeing and feeling each others arms, leaving us with one final kiss goodbye, she had let me go first, for she want to see me leave instead of me seeing her leave me. At that point, she felt what I had felt when I saw her right next to that door. My chest was so heavy when I left her. All I remember of her is that she's standing outside staring at me leaving her behind with a flying kiss of goodbye.

Now that she's gone, I have to face my daily life and accept that my love is no longer here with me. I have to wake up, sit steal, and remind myself that I don't need to pick Diane up at her house and go out like we always did when she was here. Thinking of something to do is hard for me, for I am use to go out and have fun with Diane daily. Me, being at home felt empty. I am use to hangout with Diane here at home cuddling after a good fun out while watching a movie. Friends had invited me to go out with them to Universal Orlando, which Diane and I went before she left for Canada, it was unlike when she was here. Friends can be fun too, yet when Diane and I are together there will always be something special is happening. Even though I have friends to comfort me, I still feel alone without Diane. I can't sleep knowing that she's far from me. The only thing that can calm me is to hear her voice, know that she's alright, and knowing and encouraging ourselves that we will see each other again. And we promised that as well.

Being at home, being bored, and remembering everything about our happy times together can be depressing and lonely, yet no matter how far the distance between us we're both still here to comfort each other for the sake of our perfect relationship. Our challenge is just starting. We both know we can do this. I love you so much Diane. And I miss you always every minute of the day.